Secret plans by a radical group of LSE insurgents to stage a second attempt at challenging the authority of LSE teaching staff have been uncovered by a senior academic. The specific target appears to be the School’s Institute of Public Affairs (IPA) and its controversial director, lawyer Conor Gearty.
Speaking exclusively to the IPA Blog, Gearty revealed yesterday that suspected members of the militant cell had been overheard in the basement of Sardinia House planning their next campaign to “liberate students from the shackles of conventional teaching methods.”
Attracted by the prospect of re-engaging students who have grown tired of sitting through lectures, faculty members are also thought to be flocking to the group and bringing students with them, a development which has rightly concerned some of the School’s most eminent academics. The insurgency is not thought to be any part of the revolt by economics students emanating from the University of Manchester which has been spreading fast in recent months.
“It’s a grave situation,” warned Professor Gearty. “Traditional teaching methods at the School are under threat. I am calling on students to remain vigilant in the face of an obviously technologically sophisticated enemy – they even have a Twitter account. It is only together that we can unite to resist these outlandish brigands.”
Student opinion on the actions of the group has been divided, with some praising their attempts to reinvigorate students’ interest in education via non-traditional methods and others decrying the group as show-offs who would be better off staying quiet and revising for their upcoming exams, lest they fail and put the reputation of LSE on the line.
The insurgents’ last strike, in October, resulted in an invasion of Westminster Cathedral crypt where crazed devotees debated their visions of ‘Hell’. According to sources close to the Guerrillas, the group’s next strike is likely to take place on May 28 at an unknown outdoor location, somewhere in North London. Professor Gearty added: “I dread to think what they have planned this time – whatever it is, it’s bound to attract undesirables who take great pleasure in challenging the status quo.”
Sources close to LSE Director, Craig Calhoun, warned that anyone identified as being a member of the banned militant group risked severe punishment. “Craig’s a tough guy when it comes to students and staff stepping out of line and questioning the authority of the School,” said the source. “Anyone seen to be part of this minority movement risks being exiled from campus, or worse – being made to dress up as a beaver to welcome new students at Freshers’ Week.”
Due to the group’s new-found confidence and a spate of recent exploits around the School, Security Guards at LSE have been put on high alert for any signs of the insurgents. One said yesterday: “We are monitoring Twitter for clues and keeping our eyes and ears open on campus. We haven’t been this worried for years – well not since someone nicked that penguin from outside Waterstones.”
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Are you concerned by the recent rise in guerrilla activity on campus? Have you witnessed any suspicious activity? If so please contact us in the comments box below.
Members of the Institute of Public Affairs will be using the hashtag #LSEGuerrillas to report strange behaviour on campus that we think might be linked to the insurgent group. We would advise all students to do the same.